Stop Making it So Hard

You know there’s a simpler way, don’t you?

This quest, this constant search, this NEED to figure it out and find the right answers, the magic path, the WAY –

Most of it is just wasted time.

Most of it not only doesn’t get you to where you want to go faster, it actually distracts you, meaning that it slows your progress and possibly even PREVENTS it.

And most of it could be completely avoided if we all just learned to listen to the one and only thing we SHOULD listen to, or be guided by.

Namely, our gut.

Intuition, in my mind, is the single most underrated business and life success tool we have at our disposal.

It’s also, for most people, the single most IGNORED business and life success tool we have at our disposal.

Of course the problem, and the reason we so often fight to listen to our gut, is a lack of trust.

Even though we believe we can live life on our terms, pave our own way, be DIFFERENT to the rest of the world, our actions show that deep down and despite what we might proclaim to be true, we don’t believe we know best for ourselves.

We assume that because we are less experienced, less ‘successful’, less known, that we can’t possibly know what’s right for us as much as somebody more experienced, more successful, more known could know what’s right for us.

We assume, that because somebody else has received levels of fame or accomplishment acknowledged on a superior level to our own, that they must Officially Know What’s Right.

And perhaps they do –

Perhaps they do know what’s right for THEM.

But even then, we’re just assuming.

Be honest now, as best as you can for this question –

How many of your coaches, mentors, gurus, the people you aspire to or seek to learn from, would you say are living completely in alignment with their own dreams, their own purpose?

I’ve spent in excess of 300k in coaching and mentoring over the past few years, and I can say with a fair amount of certainty that I’ve only had two mentors who (as best as I can tell) are TOTALLY in alignment and living life on their terms. The rest have openly admitted that one or more areas of their lives are seriously suffering as a result of the time, energy, emotion they’ve put into what they’re doing in their business. In some cases, they’ve said things like ‘that’s just how it is’. In other cases they’ve continued to actively work on finding that balance, that TOTAL joy and certainty.

I’m not going to name names here, so don’t ask. But that’s not the point anyway. And nor am I trying to say that everybody should have it all together before they try and guide others. Certainly not!

But here’s my point –

Even if we CAN find somebody to learn from who is so bang on track in all areas of their life that they are just a shining light of PURE purpose, passion and flow, who is to say that what got THEM to there is what will get YOU to there?

And who is to say that their VERSION of ‘there’ is actually what you want?

Hardly a ground-breaking idea, that we should all have different goals and desires, is it?

But yet the common approach to success in ALL areas is to look to those who’ve achieved it and seek to model the path that took them there.

On the surface this seems smart. Necessary, even.

And perhaps it is to an EXTENT.

But here’s where we fuck it up royally –

We start out okay, listening and learning, and seeking to grow.

This is good.

We then DEPLOY what we are learning, what we’re being told to do, what we see others doing.

This is OKAY.

We then (generally) KEEP ON DOING IT REGARDLESS OF WHETHER OR NOT IT FEELS AWESOME, ALIGNED or just plain RIGHT for us.

That’s the fucked up part.

And it’s also where you make it SO damn hard on yourself.

You see there’s nothing WRONG with learning from others.

I think it’s ESSENTIAL that you seek to understand more, encounter more, even be guided by those who’ve gone before you.

But if your true goal is a business and life that is in fact ON YOUR TERMS, and also on PURPOSE for you, one that allows you to serve in the way you were BORN to and to work from a place of absolute joy and flow, then sooner or later?

You’re going to have to pave your own way.

You’re going to have to go against the grain.

You’re going to have to go where others have NOT gone before.

You’re going to have to, as Robert Downey Jr would say, listen politely, nod your head, and then do whatever the fuck you were going to anyway.

Even if it goes EXPRESSLY against the advice handed to you by those you admire, by those who seem to know more or even it all, by those you have perhaps PAID for advice.

You think that people like Louise Hay, Richard Branson, Thomas Edison, Henry Ford, Donald Trump, Mark Cuban, that these people followed a cut and paste PATHWAY to get to where they are?

I don’t think so.

I think they MADE the fucking pathway and in some cases BULLDOZED the damn thing.

If we are to be truly GREAT and to live an ALIGNED life of destiny, to be who we were CALLED to be in this world, then we need to at some point STAND ON OUR OWN TWO FEET.

We need to have the God damn BALLS to say and do what we think, regardless of what the world thinks and regardless even of what those we ADMIRE think.

And this is the tough part, isn’t it?

Because deep down, even though you may READILY eshew the ways of the ‘ordinary’ world, it’s natural to still seek recognition.

To still be a PART of something.

To be part of a MOVEMENT.

This is a huge reason why so many women entrepreneurs all seem to be churning out the same stuff. Tired, boring, bland, SAME. Scared to stand out and be different, while at the same time hating the fact that everyone in their industry is the same! Wanting to help people PROPERLY, yet not realising that through their lack of courage in just saying what they THINK and being who they ARE, they become part of the very same problem they despise.

Me too, for a long while, and even now on occasion still.

[pq] It is HARD being different. [/pq]

And ironically enough, it is hard being YOU.

The hard part is not the actually doing, not the actual path that your inner guidance tells you to take. The hard part is giving yourself permission to listen, and act from within, in the first place.

So here is what I want to say to you today.

To me, also.

To all of us.

If you won’t choose to trust now, when will you?

And if you can’t choose to trust ever, then why not just admit it now, and be done with it?

You’re either a leader, or a follower.

And honey, I gotta tell you –

(And I know it seems kinda obvious, but I’ll say it anyway) –

Leaders?

They lead.

They pave the way.

The go AGAINST the grain.

They go with their HEART.

They listen to what others have to say or recommend, yes even those they admire and aspire to be like –

They take it all on board –

Consider it carefully –

Nod their head –

And smile –

And then they go and do whatever the fuck they were going to do anyway.

That’s what makes a leader.

That’s what creates TRUE success.

That’s what living the DREAM, surely, is about.

And that’s what it’ll take, ultimately, and no matter how much you may first try to find a SAFER or easier to FOLLOW way, to be you.

If you’re not going to be you now, when will you ever be?

Stop making it so hard gorgeous.

Do you.

Listen within.

Go all out with what you find there.

Choose in ADVANCE not to be swayed.

Give it your ALL.

PAVE the way.

And start today.

After all!

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